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Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Things to while away the hours waiting for our beloved customers to appear and do their holiday shopping! 

Write you own letter to Santa...

this is how mine came out ;->

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Emmy's Christmas party. It was Jane who spiked the punch with too much Coca Cola. I can't help it if I drank 13 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Jasmine.

I thought it was funny when I put Irene's Shawl on my head and danced the tango on the sofa while singing `Desparado'. I didn't mean to break Emmy's computer and don't know why Emmy would sue me for Public Nuisance.

I don't remember calling Stretch's wife a tall sheep---even though she looked like one with cerulean blue eye shadow and emerald green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Emmy's husband's ears, it was only because I ate too much of that steak.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my van through my neighbor's living room. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a hot cat and have me arrested for littering!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all soft and silky. And I'm really not to blame for any of this gentle stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and wickedly yours,
Lilly (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 13 bucks!

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Better get it out of your systems now.... 

From an email I rec'vd - just had to post it here ;-> And while I do not personally advocate some of the options listed below, I do think that if we want to continue to cherish and care for our country and our ideals, they need to be protected (though not necessarily glorified.)

For those of you not planning a move to Canada or going underground and

waiting for the revolution.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


Better get busy . . . here are some things to do before the
Coronation/Inauguration.

1.) Get that abortion you've always wanted.
2.) Drink a nice clean glass of water.
3.) Cash your Social Security check.
4.) See a doctor of your own choosing.
5.) Spend quality time with your draft age child/grandchild.
6.) Visit Syria -- or any foreign country, for that matter.
7.) Get that gas mask you've been putting off buying.
8.) Hoard gasoline.
9.) Come out -- then get right back in. HURRY!
10.) Borrow books from library before they're banned: Constitutional law books, Catcher in the Rye, Harry Potter, Tropic of Cancer, etc.
11.) If you have an idea for an art piece involving a crucifix, do it now.
12.) Enroll your kid in an accelerated art or music class.
13.) Start your school day without a prayer.
14.) Pass on the secrets of evolution to future generations.
15.) Learn French.
16.) Go see Bruce Springsteen before he has his "accident."
17.) Go see Mount Rushmore before the Reagan addition.
18.) Take photographs of animals on the endangered species list.
19.) Take a walk in Yosemite without being hit by a snowmobile or a base jumper.
20.) If you're white, marry a black person; if you're black, marry a white person.
21.) Attend a commitment ceremony with your gay friends.
22.) Take a factory tour anywhere in the U.S.
23.) Jam in all the Alzheimer's stem cell research you can.
24.) Visit Florida before the polar ice caps melt.
25.) Visit Nevada before it becomes radioactive.
26.) Visit Alaska before The Big Spill.
27.) Visit Massachusetts while it is still a state.
28.) Stay out late before the curfews begin.
29.) Make the statement, "You can't do that--this is America


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